photo credit: Olivia Pazak
Throughout one’s high school career, there are many different aspects of being a high schooler. Friendship is one of the most important parts of high school. These friendships tend to change from the end of middle school to freshman year, and change even more during the course of high school till senior year. While friendships may not seem important in the long run, it’s proven that having a good set of friends is beneficial. In our current generation, the rise of online friendships is rapid, and while they may come with benefits, having real life friends is highly important. Freshman Friendships As teens progress through middle school to freshman year, friendships start to change. Friendships throughout high school change while adventuring the trials and tribulations of going from a freshman to a senior. Every year, for the freshmen, friendships grow in various situations, whether that’s by meeting at a football game, being paired up for an assignment or the first day icebreakers. Ninth grade friendships play a crucial role in the development of self-identity; early connections help students explore and find out who they are, fostering greater self-awareness and confidence. Early peer relationships are pivotal for identity formation in adolescence, according to the Journal of Youth and Adolescence. Freshman Ava Houston had something to say about her freshman friendship experience so far. “I have zero friends starting off this year, probably one. I don’t have any close friends, but it also depends on what you classify as a friend,” Houston said. Finding one’s footing and a dependable group of friends during freshman year can feel like a major challenge. However, early support systems can reduce the likelihood of loneliness and could even lower risk of mental health struggles later in high school, according to the Journal of Adolescent Health. “It’s mostly when you get new classes. It was a great opportunity to make friends you didn’t know you would have,” sophomore Alyssa Chase said. During freshman year, students often learn to refine their social groups and values. Sparking personal responsibility and maturity. In fact, building positive peer connections in the ninth grade has been linked to long-term resilience and well-being, according to Child Development Research. “Everyone started to figure out who they were after freshman year; those people are the ones I stayed friends with. The ones before freshman year, I did not,” Kylie Ellison said. The pressure to fit in with different peer groups can cause some students to drift away from their initial friends. Early high school friendships often dissolve as teens adapt to new environments and develop different social priorities, according to the Journal of Adolescent Health. “I feel like everyone has their own freshman groups that they stay with, unless you switch up because you value popularity and getting recognition from boys more. That’s why the majority of freshman girl friendships end: boys,” Ellison said. There is a notable difference between the friendships formed during freshman year- often based on proximity of classes or shared schedules while upperclassmen typically look for deeper long-term friendships and shared future goals. “I felt like, in freshman year, I cared more about the quantity of friends I had, rather than the quality. Now, if they don’t share the same values, I don’t bother wasting my time,” Chase said. “At the beginning of freshman year, I wanted to be friends with everybody. Now, I’m only friends with the people I like,” Ellison said. Maturing is realizing sharing the same values with one’s friends is most important. High quality relationships with a best friend could increase motivation and improve the ability to do schoolwork or even make sure they get a decent job later on, according to the American Psychological Association. Forming friendships in the ninth grade could encourage students to form/join clubs together, sign up for a sport or even just school events they don’t want to try out alone. It not only builds friendships but also helps build leadership skills, discover interests and feel connected to the school community. Senior Friendships Friendships during the early years of high school could teach students a lot, not just in the moment, but looking back on them too. Freshman year friendships are the foundation of the high school experience. Creating everlasting moments and shaping students to grow socially and mentally for the upcoming years. Throughout students’ high school years, there are so many activities they could participate in including football games every Friday, participating in sports teams or volunteering for places in one’s community. Especially for seniors, they have been cherishing school events like senior sunrise, skip days and the student section at football games. But, no matter what seniors decide to do their senior year, there’s one common theme throughout all of these activities: Friendships. Now that it’s the beginning of the end for the class of 2026, it’s time to recognize what kind of friendships senior students have made. “Long-term friendships are especially important because it’s someone you’ve had time to grow and connect with over a long period of time and who has seen you in different stages of your life. This is especially important in high school because our personalities and styles constantly change in high school,” senior Riley Brooks said. According to Sonder Behavioral Health & Wellness, friendships have to be mutually supportive in order to maintain a healthy long-term friendship. Throughout the past four years, the seniors have experienced many changes and developments. However, they have also been able to support each other throughout these changes. Those connections create an unspoken feeling that friends “have your back”, creating healthy long-term friendships after high school. “Friendships in high school play an important role in adolescence. You’re increasing time with friends and less with family, so you’re leaning more on those friendships. This happens because students are more likely to be able to tell things to their close friends rather than their parents. So, it’s important to make sure you’re building healthy friendships to keep that support system,” Sandy said. A principle of maintaining friendships until senior year is making sure one is building healthy friendships. When friends build that bond and trust for each other, it’s important to maintain a healthy friendship to have that support, they learn more about themselves and each other, causing them to trust each other more as they grow. “Activities give common experiences in friendships that lead to creation of core memories. Activities and quality time help us know what we have in common and give us chances to socialize, collaborate and find out what happens when we disagree. That creates a sense of nostalgia on those core memories you create,” Sandy said. Experiencing “core memories” with friends during senior year is something that is sentimental. It helps enjoy seniors’ last high school moments together, along with past memories they’ve had together. This brings senior friendships closer together, providing support and connection. “I plan to stay connected with my friends after high school by making sure to keep in touch over messages, FaceTime and social media. I also would like to try my best and see them as much as possible when we all come home for holidays or breaks,” senior Olivia Pazak said. A major conflict for a lot of senior friendships is leaving to different colleges and careers once they graduate. It’s important to keep in touch and try to spend as much time as possible with those connections. According to Flash Pack, it’s important to use distance as an advantage and cherish the rare times together . “The hardest part about maintaining friendships is definitely finding time to hang out. I’m in a marching band, and my other friends are in other activities. Sometimes, it’s hard finding a day where we’re all free to hang out,” Brooks said. Figuring out when to hang out during senior year can be difficult for students, especially with all the extracurricular activities, school and sports. It’s hard to manage time to hang out with friends. However, it does make times when they do hang out even more special. “Stable friendships throughout high school are important because your friends are the people you can talk to about anything. Usually, there’s things people don’t want to talk about with your parents or teachers, because friends will just understand more. One night out with your friends is all that it takes to keep your mind off a stressful week of sports and school,” senior Hadlee Hall said. Digital Friendships Waking up, it’s 6 a.m; the first thing teens do is check their phone, their messages, Instagram and Snapchats. They read through messages, open and snap back friends. However, at school though when they see those ‘friends’ in the hall, they’ll at the least give a little wave. This is a daily occurrence for teenagers: making friends online, becoming ‘close’ through social media. It’s possible to never talk in person, and some have never even met. This doesn’t create a good position to create a real connection. “Forming a connection with another person is a good thing. We know that from a psychological perspective, friendships, especially good friendships, are beneficial for overall well-being,” AP Psychology Teacher Brooke Sandy said. Research shows that humans need to have face-to-face interactions at least once a week. These interactions not only help mental health but physical health as well according to the Washington Post. “Having the in-person connection that’s real, you get the emotions out of it instead of just a screen and emojis. And over text, you can have misunderstandings and miscommunication as opposed to in person that can be avoided for the most part,” junior Danielle Drayer said. Forming friendships online has gone on forever. Sandy said during the pandemic social media and smartphone usage rose significantly. Screentime rose by 50 percent according to Western Sydney University. But now that the pandemic is no longer, teenagers have kept their screen time up and their in-person communications low. “I have had students kind of anecdotally or as a whole throughout classes talk about how their use of technology or their time on technology is something that concerns them,” Sandy said. When talking to a person online, people tend to put on a different persona. They might be more confident and say things they don’t mean or things they would never actually say. This tendency leads to negative outcomes for the friendship because the other person can rightfully question their authenticity, according to Psychology Today. “It [An online only friendship] doesn’t last long because if you don’t actually talk to them in person it doesn’t feel real. Also, I learned that people online tend to say things that they normally wouldn’t say. And some people act differently than what they wouldn’t act like in-person,” Drayer said. Online friendships can also cause confusion and misinterpretation causing some people to be put in an uncomfortable situation. “I have had many negative experiences with online friendships. Some people who I thought were friends misinterpreted me as someone who I wasn’t. And they thought that I had certain opinions and feelings based on the way I texted or snapped,” Drayer said. Though the media has a clear negative affect on relationships, there can be some positive effects. Online relationships are great for introverted teens. They are less likely to feel judged and can meet people with similar interests, according to wearerestless.org. “I like how you can acquire new friends online. Once when I had a class with someone, we talked over snap and then started talking more in person and became closer friends,” Drayer said. Forming friendships online using social media has become a new normal, compared to how it used to be. It’s much easier for teens to go on their phone rather than enjoy being outside with friends. Ever since Covid, that’s all they’ve known according to ineqe.com “And so it’s not even like where we are now. We shouldn’t even be trying to get back to quote, unquote normal. We should be trying to improve what we know from where we were before,” Sandy said. They can’t go back to how it was before, but they can make it better, Sandy said. Using what teens know from before Covid, having face-to-face relationships can help improve the new normal. Drayer likes making friends online, “If you actually turn that friendship into a friendship that happens in person.” Then continues with, “If it’s just a friendship that happens all online, no, I dislike it.” In current times, forming friendships online is gaining more popularity due to Covid and the rise in electronic dependency. While making friends online may be easier, teens need to also have friends that we see in-person often. Psychological Benefits of Friendships With school fully back in swing comes the blossoming of new friendships. A stable support system of friends is crucial as teenagers go through adolescence, and there’s psychological evidence that proves this fact. Friendships have many benefits including having people to hang out with or to laugh with, but friendships also give adolescents many benefits that sometimes aren’t always explicit. “Friendships bring immense value to our lives. Psychological research shows that having social connections is one of the most reliable predictors of a long, healthy and satisfying life. In adolescence, friends largely become our largest form of social support. When we go through difficult times, we have someone to turn to, and we understand that we aren’t alone in our experiences,” Sandy said. The American Psychological Society did an experiment on people’s heart rates throughout a week. Studies showed that when people have a friend by their side through the hard times they are less likely to have elevated heart rate activity than those who work alone. This shows how having a friend can not only be helpful to our mental health but also helpful for people’s physical health. “As we develop emotionally and mature, friendships become deeper and more emotionally beneficial and supportive. When we are young, our friendships are built on shared interests or activities. As we grow older, our friendships grow deeper based upon shared values and feelings,” Guidance Counselor Matthew Brown said. EBSCO Knowledge Advantage also did a shock experiment on a few chosen individuals. In this experiment, half the people were told to expect extremely painful shocks, while the others were assured that the shocks would produce a painless feeling. The folks were asked to indicate where they preferred to wait while the electrical equipment was set up, and they had two options: to wait alone or wait with a group of people. Those who expected painful shocks preferred to wait with other subjects, while those who expected painless shocks expressed no preference. Schachter concluded that, as the saying goes, “misery loves company.” “Many studies suggest that having healthy friendships could have a protective effect on health and help us age better. Some research has examined whether social networks could influence mortality, heart attack survival, depression and anxiety. Our social networks (the ties we have) can affect our moods, with some evidence suggesting that feelings such as happiness can spread through a network,” according to The British Psychological Society. Growing up with friends can lead to having better relationships and social skills, which will later help when getting a job, meeting new people and eventually starting to form romantic relationships. Friendships help guide and build people for the future. From small talk, to deep conversations, friendships help people know how to communicate with others. “Kids who have low social skills know that if you don’t have friends you don’t have places to learn some of those skills. Plus, you don’t learn the ways to be intimate and learn how to listen to people,” Associate Professor of Psychology at the Marion campus of The Ohio State University Chris Daddis said. Friendships are crucial to get through life. They not only give someone to lean on, but they give someone to experience life with. Overall, friendships help people grow and prepare for the life people will later experience. Without friendships, adolescents would struggle with not having a support system and developing social skills that are so needed for life. Therefore, hug one’s friends a little tighter and never forget to thank them for all they truly do that can go unnoticed.
